The Post-Revelation High

Last week, I had a little revelation that turned out to be a big giant revelation that pretty much changed my entire life.  I think this is kind of like bringing home a tiny puppy who becomes a GIANT DOG, except that I don't have to follow my revelation around with a poop bag or buy it squeaky toys. Still, it really and truly has changed my life, because once I realized why I was yelling at myself all the time inside my head, I stopped, almost instantaneously.  I feel like I've been racing around my whole life with talk radio blaring in my frontal lobe, and I just managed to turn it off.  It's so much easier to think with it off!  And it's so much more pleasant inside my head!  In this very odd and liberating way, it's also bigger, like moving out of a shitty little studio into - I don't know - the land mass of Asia.

The sense of peace I've felt since the yelling stopped is almost indescribable.  I'm less stressed.  I'm less panicked.  I'm just . . . content.  I keep joking that I feel emotionally stoned. 

In this weirdly contented state, I've not only been incredibly productive (check my wonderstrange blog for pics of all the things I finished this week), but I've also managed to accomplish something that I've been trying to get done for a good year and a half: I've carved out time for skill development.  At 10:00 PM promptly, each and every day this week, I have stopped working so that I can either do an acrylic painting workshop or practice drawing.  I am several pages into a sketch pad, but I also created these Artist Trading Cards for a "Fancy Dress" swap - which is not meant in the British sense, but in the sense of fancy historical costumes:

This one will have more added to the background before I'm finished:

 This one isn't finished either.  I am bothered by the floor - but certainly not too bothered to post it.  A week and a half ago, I wouldn't have dared.  Man, I like this revelation thing!